memang.

a'ah memang. tadi cakap tak nak edit blog sbab sibuk. ntah pape la. tuptup nilah hasilnya 15 minit kemudian. hahahahahhaha. edit jugak. warna pilihan kali ini kuning. why? entah. aku suka. edit gegitu je. x guna html and whatsoever things yg complicated tuh, ambik jer dr template. senang cerita. bikin poning beta saja. dulu2 rajin ah, siap bagik photoshop background, banner.. haiseh. sekarang dah ada kemudahan, gunakan.. and aku baru tau ada banyak font yang best dah ada. kalau tak, asyik2 arial. isk. oklah udah2 la tu mensia-siakan masa ni. baik start buat assignment karang tak siap, sendiri nangis .

holiday itu cuti

one week of break. lots and lots of things happen during a week. Some were awesome some are bleehh..Well, although there is good internet connection at my home, still malas nak blog. I don't know why. So let's me summarize up things happen during this holiday.

1. Hari Raya Aidil Adha
one of the most memorable moments that I have with my family. First of all, everyone go back this time, which is cool because, it's getting harder to gather around even in holiday. We celebrate it in Mukah, our family style. hehehe. Indulging in seafood barbeque despite the allergic. I rela makan ubat, yang penting, delliiiccioous! Didn't go to the beach this time due to a very scary ribut at the evening, instead I just go to sleep. My mom also booked a masseuse for us, then we have massage treatment kampung style. It was great since I was so tense before holiday.

2. Birthday
yeap, my birthday. Last Wednesday. no celebration. It's my 21st birthday and no celebration. A bit upset though but can't blame it, my family does not really celebrate birthday. The first time I celebrate my birthday was with my friend. Sad, no? So the next day, my brother asked me to go to carwash, cuci itu kancil. I took that opportunities to wander the city alone. XD Ask me 2 tahun lepas to do this, I would say it is crazy, no way I want to wander the city alone. But you know what, sometime, it helps ease your mind. Yeah probably people stare at you, but who cares, right? I did enjoyed my little tour. I go in and out kedai, browsing different stuffs dijual. I even masuk in saloon randomly and ask for a haircut. Yeap, I cut my hair. heheheh:) I always randomly cut my hair. Then last Saturday, I went to Saberkas bought a new laptop as my own birthday gift. ^__^ Last year I got myself le E72, this year I get myself a... wait for it... SONY VAIO. awsome! hehehhe. I picked my favorite colour, which is blue. (I want white actually but they have no stock.:/)

3. Work progress
nothing.nein.zero. isk. I totally not suppose to holiday. haiseh. Anything pun xda progress. I just started doing work last night. haiseh. That is depressing.

anyway, holiday is over and I'm pretty backed up with works so pretty busy this week. Gosh. I want to edit this blog but I have other things that more important to do.

=.= dah busy sibuk nak komplen.boring pun sibuk nak komplen jugak. apalah nak jadi. eh, aku post dalam English balik la. hahaha isk.rojak rojak.

post penunggu.

post ini wujud because I'm waiting for my dad to picks me up. Holiday.. yeah. okey, nampak sangat tak ikhlas. Actually I don't feel any excitement about the holiday.. No counting days on so forth. Being depressed about fyp and midterm lately ruined a little bit of my holiday's mood. With issues going around recently, totally kills the mood. haiseh. but I shall enjoy it because I'll be bertapa in lab during semester break.huhuhu.. Going back to Mukah this Raya, oh yeah! I can play along with my cute cousins :) Rindu dorang.

On the other matter. My birthday during holiday again.. hehehe :) sadly I won't be around with my friends. Since most of the time my birthday celebration was with my friends, dgn family x sangat. but still at least it's not in exam week. :)

what else? hmm.. Selamat bercuti to everyone. Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha to all Muslim friends and to me too :) Maaf Zahir Batin. buang yang keruh ambillah yang jernih. peace no war. :)

I'm sad.

I haven't felt like this for a long time. The last time masa 1st time jadi JPK dulu. now macam deja vu plak. I'm sad for a lot of reasons. Its tangled up in my mind all day long. sigh. Entah how to explain. All my life, I always avoid conflicts. That's how I've been raised. I don't go look for troubles. I'm not that adventurous like that. Living cowardly you might say. Not that I care. but yeah, I don't like conflict, because solving it is exhausting.

Another thing about me is I am loyal. I don't intend of boasting or what, but yeah I am loyal. I loyal to what I believe in. And what I believe in is friendship. And whenever my friends need me, I always tried my best to be there. So when my friends having rough time, it's hard for me to ignore about it. Say anything you want but that is what I am. I wish I am stronger so I can get through this.. haiseh.

blaming on what?

today officially jadik fan of He is We. tau tak sape? g google. I first thought band laki.. skali dgar, suara perempuan plak. Actually stumble on their video time cari lagu Greyson Chance.. yang penting I like their songs. ada yang happy, upbeat song, ada jugak yang sad,dark and ominous song. My first fave right now is He is We-Our July in the rain. A very short song but sangat menyayat hati.

anyway post kali ini is about the thoughts yang berlegar dalam minda while hearing their songs. Dalam menghayati lagu2 dorang aku sempat menganalisis sifat2 my past relationships.. well, terfikir, eh, why it doesn't work out? Everything just fine tapi tak sampai ke mana. things I never care before. knapa sampai sekarang I single.. the answer? ntah. I have no idea. but this is perasaan aku about relationship. it scares me out. Being in relationship means you open up your heart to the other half. Open up our heart to someone makes us feel vulnerable. that's the scary part. being vulnerable. entah kenapa, tapi I don't think I'm ready yet to be that close to people. Being hurts once taught you to be more careful next time, no?

ok.dah. mengarut pagi2 buta. bye.

update kedua

hello! dah nak masuk midsemester dan ini adalah post aku yang kedua.. huh.. sibuk tak sibuk =.=" banyak benda yang menyibukkan aku dan seperkara lagi..laptop ku rosak!!! uwaaa T_T skarang blogging guna laptop lama kakak. sobssobs.. x best y'all, guna laptop orang. haiseh..

anyway, nothing much to update. saya budak tahun 4 so projek ada banyak melambak.huhuhuhu..

and nak crita.. last two weeks, I was a choreographer! awesome.. yes, before sy juga pnah choreographing, but this is different. the 1st choreographing job adalah ntuk performance. this one untuk competition. sempena pesta konvo. and budak2 tu all juniors and mostly first year. so fhm2 jela ke-excited-annya.. it was challenging. why? first sorang pun xde basic modern dance, adela sorang tu okay tp dia budak shuffle. dan diorang sangat passion. that makes my job fun.. betul cakap orang,bila kita buat something yang kita suka, jam berlalu dengan cepat. kalau kat kelas, baru 15 minit duduk, dah start jeling2 kat jam..hahahha anyway, nak cakap, pressure nya semestinya tinggi. Ditambah pulak dengan komitmen2 yang lain.. latihan dahla time malam... tapi apa yang aku suka, we all had fun. And the best part is, jumpa budak Showdown 2011. waseyh.. *actually, aku x pernah tgok pun showdown* anyway, with experiences dan trainings yang diorang ada, of coursela diorang menang. Tapi still aku bangga dengan crew aku, sebab dahla all-girls, then first-timer pulak tu.. so I know korang x baca ni, I really proud u know. terharu..

Tu je la yang aku nak cakap. len kali I cerita lagi k. hahahha

hi. again.

Last post : 9th June. walaoweh. 3months or so.If there is an actual spider duduk lam ni, confirm dah beranak pinak sampai tujuh keturunan.

where I've been? anywhere. It's just I forgot my own password.. TWICE. T_T baru masuk 20, n I already lupa itu ini. Therefore, sekarang tulis password besar2 dekat post-it-note and letak kt wallpaper. =.=

ok. plus masa tu aku stop blogging skjp..XD now the reason knapa aku teruskan blogging wpun bakal bz dgn all the study, is because this is ONE of the things that keeps me sane. :) I need to keep myself sane so I can graduate. :)

what else? later la... I ada kelas on 2pm.. adios!